<< The chemistry of infatuation >>
Jacob Ninan
Playing with fireThere are things which are too wonderful for me--the way of a man with a maid - Prov.30:18,19 What makes a boy/girl or man/woman get attracted to each other? After much advance in science we still do not fully understand how it happens. But we know something happens when a man or woman meets the other. Something gets initiated in our mind, and it can also cause physical changes in our body. Many parents have come to know that once their son or daughter has ‘fallen in love’, there is virtually nothing that can change their mind; they become so infatuated with their friend that they seem to have lost their reason.
The force of infatuation can be very strong. Once we allow ourselves to be moved by the attraction of the opposite gender, there is a dulling of some of our mental faculties, and we get carried away by feelings rather than stopping to think about the consequences. We may even feel that others do not notice anything. But while this starts in our mind, soon it cannot be restricted to our mind. We begin to show affection and feelings to each other with looks, words, and time together. A response from the other person quickens our pace, and soon we find ourselves sitting together, petting each other, etc., and ultimately taking the final plunge.
But the sad fact is that this infatuation may not be genuine love. Amnon, the son of David, felt strongly infatuated with Tamar, his sister, and soon raped her. Once that was over, his ‘love’ suddenly turned into hatred. His infatuation had driven him to insane acts. Isn’t this how people ‘fall’ into affairs, while married, with other married people and all kinds of people they should know better than to get linked to?
Our safety lies in watching over our hearts and preserving our commitment to our marriage, recognising our boundaries and not allowing any infatuation to develop towards anyone else.
Lord, I am determined to keep my integrity in this area of sex, even though I find the battle strong. I look to You to preserve me.
Published in Management Devotional - Biblical insights for daily work life, Christian Institute of Management.