Jesus said that very few people would find the way to life (Mt.7:13,14). We can see that out of the many who hear the Gospel, very few have actually come to life. Many of those who think they have come to Jesus have not actually experienced His grace, because there are no real changes in their lives. One reason is that many of them have not seen themselves as sinners in the sight of God and repented. The reason for it is that the modern preaching of the Gospel has largely omitted addressing sin.
Our sinful nature delights in finding fault with others, and then when we compare ourselves with them, we feel good! We don't think we are as bad, and we even think that we are in fact better. We may think that God must be very happy with us because we are not like all the others (Lk.18:11). That is our undoing! Unfortunately for such people, Jesus came only for saving sinners and not for those who think they are not bad sinners (Mk.2:17). Actually, every single one of us is a sinner before the holy God, but only those who realise that in their heart seek a Saviour. Until we come to see that if Jesus had not come there would have been no hope for us, repent from our sinful way of life and turn to Jesus, we cannot be saved.
Another side of this matter is that most people, including born again Christians, have not come to realise that without God's help we cannot do anything worthwhile. Jesus, the Son of God who had never sinned at all, recognised that He could do nothing without God the Father (Jn.5:30). Of course, by ourselves we are able to do many things, sinful or natural, with the strength and abilities which God has given us. But can we do anything at all that is eternal, heavenly, spiritual, without God prompting us, guiding us and strengthening us?
Some of us have a lot of 'natural' skills and abilities, and we can seem to shine even in 'spiritual' ministry. We make up our grandiose plans for ministry without first waiting on God. But on the final day when everything is 'tried in fire' by the piercing eyes of the Lord, it may turn out that many ministries get burnt up (1Co.3:12,13). What God expects from worship – spirit and truth – is the same that He expects from us about everything that we do (Jn.4:23). All else is going to burn up.
Even when we don't realise this, God knows it. So, He keeps trying to bring us to zero regarding our self-righteousness and self-reliance. Think of how He dealt with Moses or Jacob, just to take two examples. When God does that with us, many times what we actually see is failure, things not going as we planned, blocking of plans we have made, etc. Instead of recognising what God is trying to teach us, do we allow ourselves to get discouraged or give up? Instead of giving up on God, can't we learn to give up on our own plans and understanding, and lean on God (Pr.3:5,6)? Then our failures will actually become stepping stones to lead us to a closer walk with God and allowing Him to lead us.
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